Hello, my starlets! It's ya girl Jay and it's the start of summer for me so I wanted to share with you, my school year. I feel like I've been put on a wild rollercoaster. I can't believe I survived. 10 months can feel like 10 years.
Tuesday, September 9th, 2016
My first day was clueless. I didn't know what class to go to. I finally got to class and thought I was safe. After school, I'm playing Best Fiends on my phone and a guy comes over and tries to get my attention. I look up to see a light skinned Shaquille O'Neal and I'm not kidding when I say he was glowing from head to toe. Automatically if someone said "Smash or Pass" I'd totally smash. Bam! Instant crush.
October 17th, 2016
Time goes by and I get to the friend zone. My rival found out about my crush and ruined it by telling him. He starts to hate me, yes, ME. Queen Bee. So after that, I kept to myself and my dairy. I'd shut everybody out.
October 20th, 2017
I and Amari argue over petty stuff she did that was petty for the next few weeks and she pops up at my house ready to jump me with 5 other people. My mom files a police report and all of us, yes me included, had to serve in school detention. And the main one who was jumping over banisters got the lighter punishment. The fuck?
October 28th, 2017
I get out before Halloween in October. Over email, we made plans to go on a date. At this point, he's calling me Mrs. Crutcher so I accept. Those plans were canceled because we couldn't go since it was on a field trip. The holding room was my classroom so I found out that he was on the Chris Brown side. You know the "I'm gonna freak you in a nanosecond with one look" type of guy.
November 18th, 2017
In November a woman who was a professional dancer on Empire came to the school to choreograph our dance routine for the Christmas Assembly. It took us only 2 weeks to get the dance just in time for the real deal. We had three remixes and 2 originals. I was a Santa baby.
January 2017
After winter break I had to realize that the only one there for me was me. Nobody gave a crap about me. I was alone in the world again. So I changed my persona. Became desolate to others and just iced myself out. It didn't feel safe to be myself.
February 18th, 2017
This is the day I got my now 1 1/2-year-old puppy. My grandma found out that a local shelter was giving away free canines to loving families for Valentines Day so knowing that for 4 years straight that the main thing that I ever wanted was a puppy. We got there looked a few and one had caught our eye. Capome aka Rupert at the time. At first, I didn't even recognize that I chose him until I smelled his peanut butter doggy breath. He was a stray pup. I understood him as did he. It was love at first sight. When I thought of a Valentine I thinking, him to be human. Bow to the wow for that. Low key the only relationship I have with a guy. LOL, sad. When we got home my mom renamed him. He was my little Pomy. He's a pitbull. And way cuter than my crush. You know who you are and don't deny it.
March 2017
I let my closest friend Kamille read my dairy. I told her to not tell anybody. She saw that it had something to do with an injury I got from my mom. It was barely noticeable. She told the counselor who told DCFS. They came to my freaking house. She didn't even say sorry for it. Now nobody reads or gets close to me because of that incident. I really vowed to stay away from the general population because I can't trust anybody. One page and DCFS comes knocking on my door.
May 13th, 2017
My sister in law graduates from college and we go to support her. After had a baby reveal for the twins. Two boys. We have a good time minus the fact that my mom was shooting shade bullets. No biggie.
May 14th, 2017
The twins were born and 4 hrs later died. I and my brother weren't allowed to go because my father was angry at the distraught couple. We were kept at his house. They were premature. I feel like my dad jinxed it because he had called it. I broke down and I still am. This resulted in more self-isolation.
June 1st My 12th Birthday
My birthday was nothing special. I came near to forgetting that I had a birthday. I just couldn't be in a position in life to where I could be happy and genuinely smile or laugh. I never was.
Summary
This whole school year, I still have gotten bullied almost, to literally, death! I have rotted in a school where my teachers saw a piece of trash in human form. My schoolmates saw a hideous beast. Not being born beautiful or lovable felt like my worst curse. The only person I have been able to count on was myself. The good part is that I now have a furry companion to love upon. Also that a bunch of people won't be there next year. This is the truth about my life. I'm the only one in my corner.